It Depends . . . Or Does It?
Posted: Tuesday, August 04, 2009
by Michael Ramzy
delusionthread.com
This is a test . . .
A well-dressed man walks into a bar and approaches a well-dressed married woman. He says this:
"WIll you spend the night with me for three million dollars?"
(Many of you are probably thinking what you would do in this situation. That's fine, this is a test, remember?)
"Sure," she says, looking at the way he's dressed and rather impressed.
"Twenty dollars?" the woman answers, aghast and offended. "What kind of woman do you think I am?"
"But I know what kind of woman you are," the man answers. "We're just haggling over the price."
Although the above is an old joke, it does illustrate the way many of us think about certain things. I'm sure most of those who are married would decline the offer (at least I hope so), yet many would think about it. It's kind of like walking into a bank with the safe open and no one in site. Not many would actually take the money, yet wouldn't most think of it? Sure. It depends, right?
Here's another one. What is the first thing that comes to mind when you hear this scenario:
A man walks up to a well-dressed woman with plenty of jewelry (rings, expensive earrings, bracelets) and wearing a very low-cut blouse. He asks her this:
"Are those real?"
Of course, he's asking about her earrings, yet many perhaps thought he was asking about a part of her body. Nothing wrong with thinking the latter since there really wasn't much to go on, yet doesn't it make you stop to think? Hopefully, the answer is yes. And yes, in this case, it does depend on the context.
We have really become a strange society in that the most innocent question can have 'it depends' as an answer, and we're fine with that. Sure, many questions are dependent on context (as in the second example), yet many are not (as in the first example). And yet, we have given people a pass for not answering a direct question: our friends, family, and especially our politicians. Here are some examples of questions that should be asked specifically to our political employees, and imagine for a moment what the response would be:
1) Do you believe in God?
That's a pretty simple yes-or-no question, I would think. And yet, we have allowed ourselves to let many people skirt the issue by either not answering or qualifying the answer (with an it-depends). I have actually had someone tell me this: "Only when there's a catastrophe." That's an interesting thought, yet probably a different article. Still, it's an it depends.
2) Do you believe in capital punishment?
Again, a simple question, yet most seem to have a qualified (rationalized) answer. Some say no way under any circumstances, some say sure, sometimes, it depends, and some say absolutely - even jaywalkers should get shot.
3) Do you love America?
Another yes or no question. Most answer it this way: "Well, I like a and b, but I don't like c and d." In other words, it depends. Most politicians would probably answer in the affirmative, although some might get away with answering in the negative. In other words, a very left-leaning politician speaking at a very left-leaning university would probably answer in the negative and get a pass, yet it is still a yes-or-no question.
4) Do you think abortion should be a right?
This is a very volatile question, yet the answer should be simple: yes or no. Those who say yes have their own reasons, although the 'keep your laws off my body' crowd really needs to come up with a better rationalization since smoking laws have been on their 'body' for awhile now and we don't hear a peep about that. Those who say no have their own reasons, of course, and they too should realize all of the permutations of that 'no'.
5) Do you think taking away citizens' guns is a good thing?
Another yes-or-no question, one that is also very volatile. The last time I wrote objectively about guns and gun rights I got all sorts of comments that were from people thinking I was actually going to come into their house and steal their guns. Geez. Anyway, this is a question that is, as with the other four above, very simple. Most would probably answer no, and yet we hear almost daily how someone somewhere is coming to take the guns. I know of no politician (outside of Texas) who would answer this question without their answer containing ' it depends'.
So. Think of the way we all think of things, and the way we answer the simplest of questions. Then think of the way politicians answer questions (when they are asked real questions and don't know the answer in advance). I don't believe we can be absolute about everything, nor should we try to be (well, it depends . . .), yet we should at least know what we believe and believe what we believe. Without qualifications or rationalizations. It depends . . . on you.
This is a test, remember . . .
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Top-level comments on this article: (8 total)This is an outstanding article by you once again. I want to meet the guy who only believes in God during times of catastrophes and I don’t want to meet the guy who wants to kill people who jaywalk. Seriously though, your point is well spoken and appropriate for politicians but also for regular folks like me.
Thanks for that. The person who gave me the 'it depends if there is a catastrophe' is someone who always, always looks at the dark side of everything. If there's one cloud in the sky, it's 'gloomy'. Takes many kinds, I guess. Thanks for reading and commenting.
Excellent article, Michael, with some profound thoughts. Trying to please everyone and not doing what's right, I believe, is the root of many problems.The majority of Americans do not want to offend anyone, but, if someone practices being themselves, SOMEONE will be upset- and so what?Again, great article.Trying to please everyone is exactly it. Happens to politicians (and many others) all of the time: just can't say no, just can't offend. Too bad, since to be honest in one's beliefs should be what people really want to hear. Thanks for reading and commenting, Ken, as always.
Hi Mike."A man walks up to a well-dressed woman with plenty of jewelry (rings, expensive earrings, bracelets) and wearing a very low-cut blouse. He asks her this:" Actually, what I'd really like to know is why the man is dressed that way. :)As for question #1, faith is one thing, belief is another. I'm not a person who finds faith an easy thing. But I neither believe in or disbelieve in God (however you might define the word). I'm keeping an open mind. I don't think there can always be a yes or no answer to this question. I think it is one that requires a lot of explanation. So I actually respect someone who qualifies their answer to this one.Oh boy ... politicians. They're not like the rest of us. Maybe they even live in fear of the rest of us. They seem to be afraid to say what they really think and feel because they might offend too many of the people who voted for them, or might lose votes. I don't listen to them because it is just too frustrating. Yeah, I'd like a straight answer now and then. If I thought I'd get one, there would be a lot more questions I'd ask.Your article made me think about my answers to those questions as well. I'm happy with the result.Thanks for a thoughtful and interesting article,Dianne (now I think I'll read the other comments)
Wow, it's the woman dressed that way, although the way I wrote it could be confusing. Faith is actually one of those 'it depends', and you got it right. The reason is simple: God means many things to many people. It isn't as cut and dry as the abortion or guns question, and yet many people believe (rightly or wrongly) that if their God isn't the one believed in, there is no belief. For example, Buddhists believe very different things about religion and a supreme being than Christians, and so do Muslims and many other faiths. Sure, there are those who pervert the religion or the 'belief', yet God to one person might be the sun, or it might be The Son, or it might be . . . something else.The point is to get people to hopefully think of the way they ask questions and the way they get responses. Politicians are well-known for being crafty (I'm being charitable) in their answers, and it's probably because they want all of the votes.Regardless, thanks for your input and I'm glad it made you think.
Michael you are on a roll! Very well said. I'm not one for wishy-washy answers when asking questions. I can give you a definite answer on every one of these questions -- but I am not sure you are looking for a direct answer as much as your are encouraging people to make a stand one way or another and be ready to give a reason for what they believe or how they feel if asked why. At least this is how I see this piece. There is only one that would be qualified with a "that depends" and that would be capital punishment. Like cold-blooded murder, self defense - yada, yada. Thanks for the thought provoking piece. Blessings to you! TeresaYou are exactly right: it's all about taking a stand. The 'it depends' crowd seems to think the entire world is grey, and while there might be some justification for thinking that way about certain things, for the most part we all believe what we believe and we should rejoice in that and try to live up to that. Thanks for reading and your input. I appreciate it very much.
Michael, you sure got me thinking and that's always a good sign. With me, you have to add "AGE" into the "it depends" equation too. In my twenties, I would rattle off an answer to each of those questions and not think twice about my reasoning. Now, semi-retired, I am about as wishy-washy as I could be. Why? One reason is my reluctance to not say something that might offend the person doing the asking - but more so, is the fact, that I am much less sure about areas, now gray, that were black and white in my youth. Well Done !Thanks. I was very black-and-white in my youth, yet I still seem to be (much to the annoyance of people who know me). I remember when I was more of a live-and-let-live kind of person, and didn't really sound off when something was . . . off. These days, I tend to stop and say, "wait a minute, that's not right." It might have to do with age, or then again it might just have to do with certain situations. For example, I couldn't care less than I do now about celebrity gossip or 'reality' television, yet say something about health care or politicians lying to the American people and I stand up and take notice. Back in my younger days, I didn't care about politics since I didn't understand (or notice) how it could affect me. So, you're right, it has a lot to do about age.Glad this made you think. That should be the point, yes? Thanks also for reading and commenting.
I think if you stand on a soap box it raises you above other people so that you cannot see what their view is. And I think many questions cannot be answered in a black and white fashion. DO I believe in God actually I do but do I believe in the same way a born again Christian does probably not. And its easy to be against abortion when its not your frightened teenager who is pregnant. And the same can be said for capital punishment it is easy to be against it when it is not your child who was murdered. My point being things can shift and sometimes we are only guessing about what we would do. I personally hope everyone has the capacity to be open to changing what they believe as new information and experiences come into their lives. Otherwise we risk getting so stuck in our opinions we forget listen to others.You are right of course, and nowhere is the 'soapbox' mentality more prevalent than in Washington. Changing beliefs and belief systems is fine, as long as there is a long, hard look at why that belief is changing. My point is there are many (too many) who change beliefs on a whim, or to please (or appease) a certain individual or group at the sacrifice of their own honesty, and not because of age (as in the comment before yours) or some other reason.Thanks for your input and comments. It is always appreciated.
Well Michael, it deepens. *smile* Your articles are always thought provokers and I enjoy them immensely. I am not shifty in my core beliefs and I will listen to the beliefs of others. This was a great article as others have said. Thank you!Thanks. Sticking to your core beliefs is the key to longevity and happiness. Well, not the key, but one of them. Thanks for reading, thinking, and commenting.
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